Tag Archive: wives

Apr 20

The Burial

An old man and woman were married for years even though they never got along. When they had a confrontation, screams and yelling could be heard deep into the night. A constant statement was heard by the neighbors who feared the man the most. “When I die I will dig my way up and out …

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Apr 19

An Old Married Couple No Sooner Hit The Pillows

An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says, ‘Seven Points.’ His wife rolls over and says, ‘What in the world was that?’ The old man replied, ‘its fart football.’ A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says, ‘Touchdown, tie score…’ After about five …

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Apr 18

A Fishing Up In Canada

A man called home to his wife and said, “Honey I have been asked to go fishing up in Canada with my boss & several of his Friends. We’ll be gone for a week. This is a good opportunity for me to get that Promotion I’ve been wanting, so could you please pack enough Clothes …

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Apr 11

Husband And Wife Are Shopping

A husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart. The husband picks up a …case of Bud Lite and puts it in their cart. ‘What do you think you’re doing?’ asks the wife. ‘They’re on sale, only $10 for 24 cans’, he replies. ‘Put them back, it’s a waste of money’, demands the wife, …

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Apr 10

THE PERFECT HUSBAND

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cellular phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen. MAN: “Hello” WOMAN: “Hi Honey, it’s me. Are you at the club?” MAN: “Yes.” WOMAN: “I’m at …

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Apr 04

Fifty Bucks Is Fifty Bucks

Buddy and his wife Edna went to the state fair every year, and every year Buddy would say, “Edna, I’d like to ride in that helicopter.” Edna always replied, “I know Buddy, but that helicopter ride is fifty bucks, and fifty bucks is fifty bucks.” One year Buddy and Edna went to the fair, and …

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Mar 31

Sweet Charity

The wife came home early to find her husband with another woman. “You unfaithful, disrespectful jerk! What are you doing? How dare you do this to me the faithful wife, the mother of your children! I’m leaving this house and I want a divorce!” The husband replied, “Wait! Wait a minute! Before you leave,at least …

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Mar 31

Cheaters

A husband and wife who are avid golfers have been happily married for 30 years, and on the day of their 30th anniversary they enjoy a wonderful day together. They have a delicious breakfast in bed, then proceed to one of their favorite golf courses. They play through to the 9th hole, both having an …

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Mar 21

Mike

Two guys meet up in a bar. The first one asks, “Did your hear the news – Mike is dead!?!” “Woah, what the hell happened to him?” “Well, he was on his way over to my house the other day and when he arrived outside the house, he didn’t brake properly and BOOM! He hit …

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Mar 20

Pain Transfer

A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer a portion of the mother’s labor pain to the father. He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both very much in favor of …

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