Tag Archive: mother

Apr 17

The Piano Player

One day at school, the teacher was talking to the class about there parent’s occupations. Jane put up her hand and said, “My mother is a nurse”. The teacher said, “That’s wonderful, she helps to cure sick people.” Andrew then out up his hand. “My father is a pilot,” he said. The teacher said, “Congratulations! …

Continue reading »

Share Button

Mar 18

Smart Blonde

A girl came skipping home FROM school one day. “Mommy, Mommy,” she yelled, “we were counting today, and all the other kids could only count to four, but I counted to 10. See? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6,7, 8, 9, 10!” “Very good,” said her mother. “Is it because I’m blonde, Mommy?” “Yes, Honey, …

Continue reading »

Share Button

Feb 03

Name The Animals

The first-grade teacher was showing pictures of animals to her students to see how many they could name. She held up a picture of a lamb, and a little girl said, “That’s a sheep!” “That’s right!” said the teacher. “How about THIS one?” she said, holding up a picture of the king of beasts. “That’s …

Continue reading »

Share Button

Jan 11

The Skin Graft

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the only skin on her body that the doctor …

Continue reading »

Share Button

Dec 14

One Sunday Morning

One Sunday morning William burst into the living room and said, “Dad! Mom! I have some great news for you! I am getting married to the most beautiful girl in town. She lives a block away and her name is Susan. After dinner, William’s dad took him aside. “Son, I have to talk with you. …

Continue reading »

Share Button

Dec 09

Winding Up The Tough Guy

I was sitting at a bar one time, when I noticed that, next to me, an old drunk was hassling one of the biggest, toughest guys I’d ever seen. The old guy was clearly blasted, and kept getting in the tough guy’s face, say, “I f*cked your mother.” Despite being huge and jacked, the tough …

Continue reading »

Share Button

Dec 05

A Woman And Her Son Taking A Cab

A woman and her son were taking a cab in New York City. It was raining and all the hookers were standing under the awnings. “Mommy,” said the little boy, “what are all those ladies doing?” “They’re waiting for their husbands to get off of work,” she replied. The cabbie turns around and says, “Geez …

Continue reading »

Share Button

Nov 13

Special Cow

There was a nun whose old body began to surrender to time. Her doctor prescribed for her a shot of whiskey three times a day to relax her. Not to be lured into “worldly pleasures”, she huffily declined. But the Mother Superior knew the elderly sister loved milk. So she instructed the kitchen to spike …

Continue reading »

Share Button

Nov 12

2 Reasons To Go School

Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son. “Wake up, son. It’s time to go to school!” “But why, Mom? I don’t want to go.” “Give me two reasons why you don’t want to go.” “Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me also!” “Oh, that’s no …

Continue reading »

Share Button

Jul 28

Mom Was Horrified When Her Daughter Discovered This in the Bathroom. This Is Hilarious.

Share Button

Older posts «

» Newer posts