Tag Archive: dinner

Mar 16

Soap And Water

A minister was asked to dinner by one of his parishioners, whom he knew was an unkempt housekeeper. When he sat down at the table, he noticed that the dishes were the dirtiest that he had ever seen in his life. “Were these dishes EVER washed?” he asked his hostess, running his fingers over the …

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Feb 17

Three Little Pigs

Three Little Pigs went out to dinner one night.. The waiter came and took their drink order. ‘I would like a Sprite,’ said the first little piggy. ‘I would like a Coke,’ said the second little piggy. ‘I want beer, lots and lots of beer,’ said the third little piggy. The drinks were brought out …

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Oct 16

Washing The Dishes

Steve is shopping for a new motorcycle. He finally finds one for a great price, but it’s missing a seal, so whenever it rains, he has to smear Vaseline over the spot where the seal should be. His girlfriend is having him over for dinner to meet her parents. He rides his new bike to …

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Aug 08

A Very Elderly Couple

A very elderly couple is having an elegant dinner to celebrate their 75th wedding anniversary. The old man leans forward and says softly to his wife, “Dear, there is something that I must ask you. It has always bothered me that our tenth child never quite looked like the rest of our children. Now I …

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Jun 19

Dining Out

A husband and wife were having dinner at a very fine restaurant when this absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big kiss, tells him she’ll see him later, and walks away. His wife glares at him and says, ‘Who was that??!!’ ‘Oh,’ replies the husband, ‘that was my …

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Jun 04

Dinner Table

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobies are there? The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son, there’s three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a women’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but …

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Feb 09

A Man Was Walking In The City

A man was walking in the city, when he was accosted by a particularly dirtyand shabby-looking bum who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner. The man took out his wallet, extracted two dollars and asked, “If I gaveyou this money, will you take it and buy whiskey?” “No, I stopped drinking years …

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Dec 30

Blind Date

A guy gets set up on a blind date and he takes her out for dinner to a very expensive restaurant to make a good impression. The waiter approaches the table and asks to take their order. The lady begins ordering practically everything on the menu, shrimp cocktail, pate, Caesar Salad, lobster, crepes Suzette, with …

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Dec 20

Three Women

Three women: one engaged, one married and one a mistress, are chatting about their relationships and decided they needed to spice up their love lives. All three agreed to wear black leather bras, stiletto heels and a mask over their eyes that evening with their respective lovers. After a few days they meet up for …

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Dec 14

One Sunday Morning

One Sunday morning William burst into the living room and said, “Dad! Mom! I have some great news for you! I am getting married to the most beautiful girl in town. She lives a block away and her name is Susan. After dinner, William’s dad took him aside. “Son, I have to talk with you. …

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